Not one of the egregious offenders

So I recently got engaged, and my nearest and dearest talked me into buying wedding planning books. I should have saved my money because so far, most of these books haven’t exactly been helpful. Don’t get me wrong, they’re not all bad. In fact, I’ve found a really great (and realistic) one. Unfortunately, this has proven to be the exception rather than the rule. Here’s some of the biggest problems I’ve found with what’s supposed to help me plan one of the biggest days of my life.

1) The budget-free bride

One of these books says that the average cost of planning a wedding is close to $35,000. That’s a down payment on a house or two years of tuition or seven Millenium Falcon guitars, all of which I would prefer to spend that kind of money on. But then again, maybe the wedding wouldn’t be so expensive if they didn’t buy things like champagne fountains. Seriously, that was a suggestion in one of the books. Listen, if you’ve got that kind of money, more power to you and I sincerely hope you enjoy your champagne fountain. But for those of us who don’t have the surname Trump or Gates, we need a book that’s a little more realistic.

2) Prepare to feel judged

These books all seem so different when you page through them, but once you read more in-depth, you realize that they are all very much the same, as in they are all quite traditional. Don’t get me wrong, I’m not planning a crazy themed wedding where I’m going to dress as a Disney princess or whatever (not for lack of trying though, my fiancé put his foot down on that one.) But we are doing a few things a little differently. For example, our friend, who is an ordained minister, is going to officiate our wedding. I didn’t think it was that unheard of, but not a single book I’ve read has mentioned anything other than a judge or religious leader. The fact that none of my books covered this particular topic made me feel quirky, and not in a good way.

3) There is such a thing as too comprehensive

Having a lot of information and options is great. But too much information and too many options can sometimes serve to do nothing except overwhelm you. I mean come on, does anyone actually need a book that’s just about writing your vows? Or is written specifically about bridal bouquets? If I had to guess, the answer is probably no, no you don’t.

To reiterate my point, there are some truly practical and useful wedding planning books out there. But you’re going to have to do a little digging to find them. Otherwise, you might end up with a champagne fountain and more information on bouquets than you’ll ever need to know .