PRINTMovie Review: Chernobyl Diaries
Chernobyl Diaries is also a disaster
PHOTOGRAPH COURTESY OF WARNER BROS. PICTURES
A simplistic plot and insufficient scares doom this summer thriller.
May 26, 2012 | 1:40 a.m. CST
Chernobyl Diaries seems like it is supposed to be a bad horror movie with poor acting, shallow characters and a weak story line. And living up to those expectations is the only way in which this movie does not disappoint.
The premise of the story is simple. Chris (former teen heartthrob Jesse McCartney), his girlfriend Natalie and her friend Amanda travel from the US to visit Chris’ wild older brother, Paul, in Kiev, Ukraine. Instead of going on to Moscow as planned, Paul tells them he met a guy who does “extreme tourism,” has a van and can take them to Chernobyl, the site of the world’s largest nuclear disaster, for a couple of hours. Chernobyl is abandoned because it’s still unsafe due to the radiation from the catastrophe more than 25 years earlier.
Related MovieNo rational person would say yes to getting into a rickety van with a stranger in a foreign country to go hang out in a radioactive abandoned town. But these geniuses are down for it. Accompanying them on the trip is a newly wed Norwegian couple with no back story.
All seven people head out to Chernobyl, and craziness ensues.
When casting Chernobyl Diaries, it seems the only qualifications were that the actors must be good looking and be able to hold a flashlight while screaming. The movie is just a bunch of scared people running around. Running from what? That is never really explained. You’re going to have to figure it out yourself. But really, the movie is so disappointing that thinking too much about it after it’s over would be a waste of time.
Chernobyl Diaries is a lot like Quarantine, a movie you probably didn’t see. It’s okay. Maybe if someone ever references Chernobyl Diaries you’ll also be able to say you haven’t seen it, either.
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