Dungeons & Dragons, the first commercially available role-playing game, celebrates its 44th anniversary this year. In the game, D&D sets up character development using an alignment chart, featuring nine categories that work to separate good and evil. The most moral of the categories, lawful good, is traditionally comprised of characters who embody compassion and honor. Its opposite, chaotic evil, includes character who are selfish, reckless and cruel.
More recently, the alignment chart has been a popular theme in memes that places different types of breads, television characters, various drunken personae and more in the chart's nine categories. In Columbia, Evan Mehuys, managing bartender at Room 38, Brandon Wilder, bartender at Flyover, and Andrew Ruth, bar manager at Barred Owl Butcher & Table, helped Vox categorize the pleasantly sweet and downright wicked cocktails of CoMo.
Black Berry Smash, Room 38, $9.50
The drink’s hue derives from its house-made infused blackberry Knob Creek bourbon whiskey. Once the mint leaves, agave and fresh lime juice are added to it and shaken, its blended flavors are “noble, true and act as compassion toward its drinker,” Mehuys says.
Sparkling Grapefruit Sangria, Room 38, $9.50
The mixture of citrus liqueur, fresh grapefruit juice, house-made strawberry puree and mint is shaken, poured over ice, and topped with champagne. “It adheres to traditional concepts of a sangria,” Mehuys says. “It’s a fortified wine-based cocktail but different.”
Keep It Classy, Barred Owl, $9
Bartenders combine Benedictine and their choice of a barrel-aged spirit and an amaro for this boozy, strong and sweet yet bitter beverage. Its flavors make it evil, but it’s lawful because it’s up to the bartender. “The bartenders get to play with it every time,” Ruth says.
Earl of Genever, Flyover, $9
As with this cocktail, the idea of royal tea has “conceptually always been perceived as good,” Wilder says. “But at the same time, the idea is kind of hoity-toity.” This tea-infused cocktail with honey, lemon and bitters gives it a classy feeling.
Don’t Touch My Drumset, Barred Owl, $8
Neither too sweet nor too tart, this beer-mixed cocktail features Logboat Lookout, mint, Pimm’s No. 1, pamplemousse rose, lemon and orange. Its combination of sweet and sour flavors make this drink “acceptable for most people,” Ruth says.
Too Good to Pass Up, Flyover, $10
This booze-filled drink gets flavor from the hundreds of ingredients mixed into the bitters, Cardamaro and Tito’s. “It’s kind of an asshole because it’s all booze,” Wilder says. “It’ll get you drunk very quickly. It tastes good — maybe too good.”
Manhattan fashioned, Barred Owl, $11
This drink features rye whiskey, bitters, raw sugar syrup and a giant ice cube that includes sweet vermouth, bourbon and bitters. As the ice cube melts, the other liquors diffuse into the drink. This drink is anarchic because it changes flavor midway through, Ruth says.
Moonshine Sour, Room 38, $10.50
This drink is simple yet inventive, mixing good and bad. Featuring DogMaster Distillery’s white whiskey, it combines agave, lime and pineapple with zesty cilantro and jalapeno. Its flavors are balanced because “it has a little bit of sweet and a little bit of heat,” Mehuys says.
Blood in the Water, Flyover, $12
Referred to as a “tiki drink,” Blood in the Water uses rum and a homemade syrup created from red wine and berries. Given its name from its deep red color, it resembles the evilness associated with blood. “It reminds you of shipwreck: injured and floating,” Wilder says.